What Stage of _ _ _ _ _ is This

What stage of _ _ _ _ _ is this

My ears hear “how are you,”
my mouth forms words,
these damn words lift
the flimsy latch
trapping tears.

I look up, straining
eye muscles that don’t exist
feeling tears fill.
You are so tall that
I still see your face.

Now I feel self-conscious:
did I make you feel
uncomfortable,
I have learned
public crying is a No-No.

No…
Oh no…
Don’t you say it!
You can’t say this:
“If there’s anything we can do to help, please…let us know.”

Now my fingers fly
to catch briny drops
from my eyes.
If tears don’t fall
maybe technically I’m not crying.